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第33章幸福的真谛
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TheEssenceofHappiness
佚名Anonymous
IliveinthelandofDisney,Hollywoodandyearroundsun.Youmaythinkpeopleinsuchaglamorous,funfilledplacearehappierthanothers.Ifso,youhavesomemistakesaboutthenatureofhappiness.
Mapeoplestillequatehappihfuhisthatfunandhappileinon.Funiserienganaessiserie.Itisdeeper,memotion.
Thelegtothebeliefthatafunfilled,painfreelifeequalshappiuallydimiheircesofeverattainingrealhappiness.Iffunandpleasureareequatedihenpaiediinfact,theoppositeistrue:Moretimesthannot,thingsthatleadtohappinessinvolvesomepain.
Asaresult,maheveryehatarethesourceoftreehappihepaiablybroughtbysugsasmarriage,raising,professio,religiousent,civicorcharitablework,andself-improvement.
Askabachelorwhyheresistsmarriageeventhoughhefindsdatingtobelessaisfyi,hewilltellyouthatheisafraidofmakingaent.Forentisinfactquitepainful.Thesinglelifeisfilledwithfuure,ext.Marriagehassuent,buttheyarenotitsmostdistinguishiures.
Similarly,coupleswhoottohavearedefavorofpainlessfunoverpainfulhappiheyeoutwheravelwherevertheyaslateastheyleswithinfantareluckytogetawholenight’ssleeporathree-dayva.Idon’tknoarentswouldchoosethewordfuntodescriberaising.
Butcoupleswhodeottohaveeverexperiehepleasureofhuggiugtheminight.Theyhejoyofwatgachildgrowuporofplayingwithagrandchild.
Buttheseformsoffundonottributeinanywaytomyhappiness.Morediffideav,raisiiionshipwithmywife,tryingtodogoodintheworld—willbringmemorehappihaneverbefoundinfupermahings.
&andingahattruehappinesshasnothingtodowithfuhemrealizationsweevereto.Itliberatestime:nowweorehourstoactivitiesthatelyincreaseourhappiliberatesmoney:buyingthatnewcarorthosefawilldonothingtoincreaseourhappinessless.Aesusfromenvy:wehatallthlamorouspeopleweweresosurearehappybecausetheyarealwayshavingsomuactuallymayall.
&weuhatfubringhappioleadourlivesdifferebe,quiteliterally,lifetransf.
我住在好莱坞迪斯尼乐园,那里全年阳光普照。
你可能认为生活在那么富于魅力,充满乐趣的地方,一定比其他地方的人更幸福。
如果这么想,你可能对幸福的真谛有些误解。
很多聪明的人仍将幸福等同于乐趣。
其实,乐趣和幸福的共同之处极少,或者说根本就没有。
乐趣是行为过程中的感受,而幸福是我们行为过后的感受,它是一种更为深刻、持久的感情。
人们坚信充满欢乐,远离痛苦的生活方式就等于幸福。
实际上,这样反而减少了他们获得真正幸福的机会。
如果欢乐和愉快等同幸福,那痛苦就等同不幸。
其实恰恰相反,多数情况下,能带来幸福的事物往往包含诸多痛苦。
所以说,许多人所逃避的艰难困苦恰恰是真正幸福的源泉。
这些人害怕那些必定会带来痛苦的事情,如结婚、抚养子女、提高专业技能、承担宗教义务、社会服务或慈善事业,提升自我等。
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